It's not an infrequent happening that I find myself feeling stuck in the immobility of the moment. I've been on my current WW journey for over 6.5 years now and while most days I'm glad to be journeying slowly, I find myself wrestling with the same old feelings and thoughts. "You're fat." "You'll never be pretty." "Why bother?" "You run?! What a laugh." "Nothing fits right." "This is hopeless." There are thousands of critical snippets I could list.
In the midst of these thoughts, I try to remember who I once was and celebrate who I now am. And, recently, I found a few photographic reminders to buoy me up. When I was reaching my heaviest I avoided the camera as much as I avoided the mirror. If I couldn't see the problem, I didn't need to admit that it existed.
Well, the four photos included below are a testament to my once-upon-a-time-big-lass. Two were taken around August 2004, I had shorter hair at that point. The other two are taken less than a month before I joined WW in January 2005. I've mentioned this before but for those new to my journey, when I joined WW at that time I was 248.6lbs- a truly big lass.
The photos are grainy as I could only find printed versions that I've scanned and cropped, but the perspective they give is crystal clear. That was then. Bigger. Slower. Unhealthier. This is now. Healthier. Lighter. Fitter. And, most importantly, happier.
Today, I'm over 75lbs lighter than I was then. I'm hoping to reach my goal and to be 95lbs lighter by my thirtieth birthday in April 2013. And, now that this post is here complete with pictures, I've got a few solid reminders that while I may feel immobile in the moment, over time I'm making a significant change.
No comments:
Post a Comment